Breaking Through Betrayal:And Recovering the Peace Within电子书

Title Page

Copyright

Table of Figures

Acknowledgements

Preface

A Note to the Clinician/Counselor

Preface to the Second Edition

Introduction

How this book came about

The purpose of the book

Section I: Knowledge and Awareness

Chapter 1 – Betrayal: What is Betrayal?

Definitions and Explanations

1. An investment met with rejection and/or abandonment

2. A profound trust in someone or something that is profoundly violated

Trust as an innate emotion

Trust without the relationship component

3. A truth that becomes a lie / A belief that is shattered

Activities – Chapter 1

Chapter 2 – Betrayal: What am I Feeling and Why?

States and Truths

1. State of Confusion

2. State of Worthlessness

3. A State of Powerlessness

Exercises — Chapter 2

Activities – Chapter 2

Chapter 3 – Betrayal: To What Degree and How Long Will I Feel this Way?

The Anatomy of Betrayal

An Underlying Principle

Degree as a “length of time”

Degree as “what we gave / what was taken from us”

Degree as “what was lost”

Loss as “personal, relational, and/or material”

Loss as “inner-personal”

Occurrence = Degree of injury

Occurrence: acute or short term

Occurrence: chronic or ongoing

Occurrence: recurrent or episodic

Occurrence: multiple betrayals

Occurrence: re-injury—from self

Activities – Chapter 3

Section II: Other Recovery Considerations

Chapter 4 – Betrayal and Codependency

Activities – Chapter 4

Suggested Readings

Chapter 5 – Betrayal and Grief

Activities – Chapter 5

Suggested Readings

Section III: Recovering

Chapter 6 –Recovering: Breaking Through the Bonds of Betrayal… and Beyond

Chapter 7 –Recovering Part One: Right Yourself

The work belongs to the betrayed—only the betrayed

Armed with knowledge

Fortified with understanding

Validated with truth

Activities – Chapter 7

End of Chapter – Healing Continuum

Chapter 8 –Recovering Part Two: Readiness and Rigor

Keeping a pulse on your place and position

Protecting yourself / Building a support network

Embracing the work ahead of you

Activities – Chapter 8

End of Chapter—Healing Continuum

Chapter 9 –Recovering Part Three: Revive and Restore

Subsection One: Cleansing and Cultivation of Internal and External Spaces

Cleansing and Cultivation of Internal Spaces

Cleansing and Cultivation of External Spaces

End of Subsection One: Cleansing and Cultivation of Internal and External Spaces—Healing Continuum

Subsection Two: Boundary Work—Bracing Yourself with Supportive Structures

Maintaining an awareness of your betrayal barometer

Boundary-based decision making

Betrayal-proofing your relationships

End of Subsection Two: Boundary Work—Bracing Yourself with Supportive Structures—Healing Continuum

Subsection Three: Fortifying Your Inner Tower

Breaking Free

Living Free

End of Subsection Three—Fortifying Your Inner Tower- Healing Continuum

End of Part Three

Chapter 10 –Recovering Part Four: Release and Renew

Forgiveness/Releasing

Practice releasing

Thought, stop, and replace

End of Part Four: Release and Renew—Healing Continuum

Chapter 11 – Recovering Part Five: Reframe and Refine

What will your picture be?

What will your legacy be—define or refine?

End of Part Five: Reframe and Refine—Healing Continuum

Section IV: Betrayal and Relapse

Chapter 12 – Betrayal and Relapse: Moving from Self-Betrayal to Self-Discovery

Chapter 13 – Betrayal and Relapse Part One: Redefining Relapse as Self- Betrayal

Betrayal of oneself and of one’s truths

Abandon, turn away, reject, or let go

Deny, forfeit, or compromise

Return to an unhealthy behavior, environment, or relationship

Activities – Chapter 13

End of Part One: Redefining Relapse as Self-Betrayal – Healing Continuum

Chapter 14 – Betrayal and Relapse Part Two: Unraveling Debilitating Emotions and Self-Deprecating Life Messages

What is shame?

What is shame’s role in relapse?

What are the outer layers and inner core of shame?

Inner core of shame

What are life messages? Why are they important?

Activities – Chapter 14

End of Part Two: Unraveling Debilitating Emotions and Self-Deprecating Life Messages – Healing Continuum

Chapter 15 – Betrayal and Relapse Part Three: Recognizing and Removing the Masks of Denial, Disguise, and Detachment

Mask of Denial – The Personality of Lies

Mask of Disguise – The Pretend Persona

The Mask of Detachment – Pulling away from Sources of Truth

Activities – Chapter 15

End of Part Three: Recognizing and Removing the Masks of Denial, Disguise, and Detachment – Healing Continuum

Chapter 16 – Betrayal and Relapse Part Four: Recognizing and Restoring Areas of Vulnerability

Triggers

Weak links in chain of events

Life changes, transitions, and other precipitating factors

Activities – Chapter 16

End of Part Four: Recognizing and Releasing Areas of Vulnerability - Healing Continuum

Chapter 17 – Betrayal and Relapse Part Five: Recognizing and Releasing the Restraints of Relapse

Recognizing the restraints of relapse

Releasing the restraints of relapse

Gifts of releasing

Activities – Chapter 17

End of Part Five: Recognizing and Releasing the Restraints of Relapse – Healing Continuum

Chapter 18 – Betrayal and Relapse Part Six: Reclaiming Ourselves and Rediscovering Our Truths

Replacing the old with the new

Rebuilding boundaries and fortifying them

Restoring self-work and self-worth

End of Part Six: Reclaiming Ourselves and Rediscovering Our Truths – Healing Continuum

Epilogue

Reward

About the Author

Bibliography

Index