How Not to Act Old电子书

Dedication

Contents

Introduction

#1

How Not to E-mail Old: 10 Musts to Avoid

#2

Guide to 11 Young-Old Slang Expressions

#3

#4

40-Year-Old Bikini Waxing Virgin? 9 Things to Expect

#5

#6

#7

How to Grind, in 6 Easy Steps

8 Best Old-People Songs to Dance to…And 7 Young Ones That May Actually Get You Going

#8–19

#20

What Exactly Is a Hookup? A Teenager Tells All…Well, Some

#21

#22

#23–29

#30

#31

I Would Love to Hold The Baby, But…

#32

Web Directory 102: 12 Sites You Should Know

#33

16 Things You Never Need to Say to Another Adult

#34

#35

#36–44

#45

#46

19 Things Never to Say to a Young Parent

#47

8 Tattoos for Old People

#48

#49

#50

12 Things You Can’t Even Think about Wearing (for Women)

#51

Pet Making You Look Old? 5 Swaps to Consider Now

#52

8 Ways Not to Phone Old

#53

5 Things to Talk about Instead of Your Kids

#54

Easy Listenin’ Rap: 9 Songs Even You Might Like

#55

3 Young Cocktail Recipes

#56

#57

#58

#59

#60

8 Hot vs. Crusty Comparisons

#61

#62

MadLibs: A Young Person’s Guide to Housekeeping

#63

#64

25 Web Expressions You Should Know Now

#65

#66

#67–73

#74

10 Other Things Not to Be Shocked By

#75

Antinegativity Spin Chart: 6 Upbeat Substitutes

#76

5 Deathless Man-Bashing Jokes

#77

#78

#79

#80

#81–87

#88

#89

#90

#91

15 Cool Dead Famous People

8 Uncool Dead Famous People

#92

#93

#94

#95

Change Your Name/Change Your Age: 10 Updates for Your Old Fart Name

#96

7 Ways to Read Younger

#97

Young Person’s Diet and Exercise Plan: 13 Simple Steps to Never Gaining an Ounce

#98

#99–124

#125

6 Ways to Renovate Your Money Complaints

#126

#127

#128

#129

#130

#131

#132

12 Steps to Making Dinner Young

#133

10 Signs You Might Be a Lech

#134

#135

#136

#137

#138

#139–143

#144

#145

12 Other Cultural References Sure to Date You

#146

9 Ways to Annoy Old

#147–160

#161

#162

#163

Old Food/Young Food: 18 Culinary Comparisons

#164

12 Things You Can’t Even Think about Wearing (for Men)

#165

12 Other People and Things That Won’t Disappear Anytime Soon (No Matter How Much You Wish They Would)

#166

8 Fear-Conquering Ideas

#167

#168

8 Other Favorites You May Want to Rethink

#169

14 Things That Used to Be Young but Are Now Old

17 Things That Used to Be Old but Are Now Young

#170

#171

#172

#173

#174

#175

#176

MadLibs: How to Celebrate Your Birthday Right

#177

#178

Chocolate-Chip Meringue Cookies

#179

#180

#181

#182

#183

8 Items of Hipster Gear You Can Get Away With

8 Items of Hipster Gear You Can’t

#184

#185

7 Cool Ways to Die (If You Must)

7 Uncool Ways to Die

Acknowledgments

About the Author

Other Books by Pamela Redmond Satran

Credits

Copyright

About the Publisher