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To Have and To Hold电子书

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作       者:Vaughan, Peggy

出  版  社:Newmarket Press

出版时间:2010-06-01

字       数:16.1万

所属分类: 进口书 > 外文原版书 > 法律/政治/宗教

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  • 读书简介
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From the author of The Monogamy Myth, an essential guide written specifically for married couples to strengthen their relationship and prevent affairs.Based on Peggy Vaughan's 30 years of work with married couples and the issue of affairs, this new handbook challenges the assumption that monogamy can be taken for granted, and provides the tools for building a strong marriage and preventing affairs.Explaining the need to focus on preventing affairs before there is any threat to a marriage, she draws on her survey of 755 people regarding their beliefs to present "What Won't Work" and "What Will Work" to prevent affairs.Throughout To Have and to Hold, Vaughan details specific strategies and techniques, emphasizing that: Relying on attitudes and beliefs is not sufficient to maintain a monogamous relationship over a lifetime. Focusing on actions and behaviors is far more significant to strengthen a relationship. Responsible honesty is the single most important factor in preventing affairs. Everybody (society as a whole) plays a role in supporting couples' efforts to maintain monogamy. Parents have a special responsibility to break the pattern for future generations. Four appendices present Vaughan's survey questionnaire along with detailed breakdowns of responses.
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Cover

Title Page

Table of Contents

Personal Note from the Author

Introduction

Part I - What WON’T Work (Relying on Attitudes and Beliefs)

Chapter 1 - Being in love with your partner

The Changing Nature of Love

The Changing Nature of Sex

Survey Results for “Being in love with your partner”

Difference between marrieds and singles of both genders

Difference between married women and single women, both with experience

Difference between single women who have (and have not) had an affair

Comments about Results for “Love”

What is “Love”?

The Bottom Line about “Love”

Chapter 2 - Having similar backgrounds and values

Marrying Your “Soul Mate”

Survey Results for “Having similar backgrounds and values”

Comments about Results for “Similarities”

Changes in Values and Priorities

The Bottom Line about “Similarities”

Chapter 3 - Having mutual trust

Survey Results for “Having mutual trust”

Comments about Results for “Trust”

The Bottom Line about “Trust”

Chapter 4 - Having high moral principles and/or strong religious convictions

Survey Results for “Having high moral principles and/or strong religious convictions”

Experience Differences

Comments about Results for “Morals”

The Bottom Line about “Morals”

Chapter 5 - Taking the marriage vows seriously/intending to be faithful (Also ...

Survey Results for “Taking the marriage vows seriously and intending to be faithful”

Comments about Results for “Vows”

Expectations vs. Reality

The Bottom Line about “Vows”

Recommitment: repeating/renewing the marriage vows

Survey Results for “Repeating/renewing the marriage vows”

Comments about Results for “Recommitment”

The Bottom Line about “Recommitment”

Chapter 6 - Having children together and being a devoted mother/father

Survey Results for “Having children together and being a devoted mother/father”

Comments about Results for “Children”

The Bottom Line about “Children”

Chapter 7 - Concerns about consequences: hurting others, getting caught

Survey Results for “Being concerned about hurting your partner and children”

Comments about Results for “Hurt”

The Bottom Line about “Hurt”

Survey Results for “Being afraid of getting caught, risking possible divorce”

Differences based on gender

Differences based on experience

Comments about Results for “Fear”

The Bottom Line about “Fear”

Chapter 8 - Having no opportunity—no free time, never travel, etc.

Survey Results for “Having no opportunity—no free time, never travel, etc.”

Comments about Results for “Opportunity”

The Bottom Line about “Opportunity”

Part II - What WILL Work (Focusing on Actions and Behaviors)

Chapter 9 - Having ongoing honest communication about all marital issues

Excuses for Dishonesty

How to Communicate Honestly

Survey Results for “Having ongoing honest communication about all marital issues”

Comments about Results for “Honesty”

Cultural Differences Regarding Honesty

The Bottom Line about “Honesty”

Chapter 10 - Acknowledging and discussing attractions to others

Survey Results for “Acknowledging and discussing attractions to others”

Comments about Results for “Attractions”

The Bottom Line about “Attractions”

Chapter 11 - Trying to meet your partner’s needs

Survey Results for “Trying to meet your partner’s needs”

Comments about Results for “Needs”

The Bottom Line about “Needs”

Chapter 12 - Having a satisfying marital sex life

Survey Results for “Having a satisfying marital sex life”

Gender Differences

Experience Differences: single women with and without personal experience

Marital Differences: married women and single women, both with experience

Differences between married men and either married or single women, all with experience

Comments about Results for “Sex”

Differences between Men and Women

The Bottom Line about “Sex”

Chapter 13 - Maintaining professional boundaries with co-workers

Factors Influencing Affairs at Work

Gender Differences in Workplace Affairs

Men

Women

The Role of “Management” in Preventing Affairs at Work

Survey Results for “Maintaining professional boundaries with co-workers”

Comments about Results for “Work”

The Bottom Line about “Work”

Chapter 14 - Avoiding personal relationships on the Internet

Survey Results for “Avoiding personal relationships on the Internet”

Comments about Results for “Internet”

The Bottom Line about the “Internet”

Chapter 15 - The bottom line

The Future of Monogamy

Epilogue:

Role of Parents in Prevention for Future Generations

Appendix I - Questionnaire and Overview of Responses Survey Questionnaire on ...

Appendix II

Bibliography

Acknowledgements

About the Author

TO HAVE AND TO HOLD

Copyright Page

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