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President Me
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My fellow Americans,President John F. Kennedy once famously said, "Hey, is that blond intern eighteen yet?" He also said, "Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country."We've changed a lot since JFK asked us all to pitch in. We've become a nation of narcissistic, yoga-mat-toting, service-dog-having, absentee dads and gluten-free, hand-wringing, hypochondriac moms of overcaffeinated (yet somehow still lazy) twerking tweens. And our government is an inept bureaucracy incapable of doing anything except getting in our wallets and in our way. We've got to get it together, America.That is why I, Adam Carolla, hereby declare myself Candidate Carolla. The tome you hold in your hands is a statement of my intent to whip our country back into fighting shape, to eliminate the "what are you going to do for me?" mentality that has invaded our country.President Me is my manifesto, my vision for a better place . . . free of Big Government, barefoot fliers, lazy hipsters who'd rather "Occupy" than work, and the other things that are bringing our country down. With my cabinet appointees, my list of worthy and necessary presidential ManDates, and tons of great ideas for fixing our health care, education, energy, and even national parks systems . . . behold an America we can be proud of. The America I see in my head.You're welcome in advance.Your future leader,Adam
Neverisms
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"Never let 'em see you sweat." "Never change diapers in mid-stream." "Never let a crisis go to waste." "Never ruin an apology with an excuse." "Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died." When we strongly encourage people to do something, it's called an exhortation. But what is the proper term for strongly discouraging peopleOne candidate is admonition. Another is dehortation, the opposite of exhortation. But perhaps the best term for an emphatic piece of dissuasive advice is neverism. You won't find the term in any dictionary (at least not yet) because quotation anthologist Dr. Mardy Grothe coined it himself for this collection of nearly two thousand quotable cautionary warnings. With the whimsical and witty intermixed with the serious and profound, contributors range from Aesop and Marcus Aurelius to John Wayne and Mae West. Grothe also tells the fascinating "back stories" of scores of classic quotations as well as the history of hundreds more that have never before appeared in a quotation anthology. Organized by topics such as Wit & Wordplay, Politics & Government, Sports, Stage & Screen, and The Literary Life, this is a book about quotations as well as a book of them. Neverisms is sure to delight quotation lovers and language aficionados everywhere.
Instant Mom
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For the first time, Nia Vardalos, writer and star of My Big Fat Greek Wedding, tells her hilarious and heartfelt bumpy-road-to-parenting story that eventually leads to her meeting an almost-three-year old girl who she knows instantly is her daughter.Vardalos chronicles it all with her signature wit and candor but also weaves in delicious behind-the-scenes Hollywood stories on the making of her films from working with Tom Hanks to meeting Oprah to having dinner with the Queen of England.In Instant Mom, Vardalos writes how moments after she finds out she has been nominated for an Academy Award, she is alone and en route to a fertility clinic, trying yet again for a chance at motherhood, wondering how long she can continue. When she finally adopts her daughter via American Foster Care, Vardalos reveals what really came next how, with only fourteen hours' notice, she and her husband transitioned their preschool aged daughter into their home. The Appendix includes information on how to adopt from all over the world. Vardalos will donate proceeds from the book sales to charities.In her memoir, Instant Mom, Vardalos reveals how she broke into the movie industry, became a working screenwriter and actress . . . and finally became a mom. Instantly.
Miss Jessie's
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Miss Jessie's is a memoir and business guide rich with inspirational life lessons and unique business advice from Miko Branch, the Chief Executive Officer of the dynamic Miss Jessie's the company that revolutionized the hair-care industry.When Miko and her sister, Titi, were children, their grandmother Miss Jessie taught them independence and showed them the value of being "do it yourself" women, all while whipping up homemade hair concoctions at her kitchen table. As a co-founder of Miss Jessie's, Miko reveals how she and Titi applied their grandmother's lessons to create a successful business from scratch. Miss Jessie's chronicles the Branch sisters' remarkable story. When they were children, their stern father encouraged them to become self-reliant and not to depend on their looks to get ahead. Taking this message to heart, they blossomed into business owners and leaders in their field, using ingenuity and without borrowing a dime. They soaked up the entrepreneurial and creative culture of the early hip-hop era on the streets of Brooklyn in the late 1990s, and in the high-end salons of Manhattan. They blended these inspirations to establish a business that has gone from their kitchen table to the shelves of major retailers around the globe, revolutionizing the hair-care industry. A charming and enlightening look at the women behind the brand, Miss Jessie's is chock-full of entertaining stories and invaluable instruction that can be applied to any business: an authentic expression that the American Dream is possible.
The Underground Is Massive
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What started as an underground party business—run and dominated by youths and hustlers—grew into the music business's greatest and biggest success. The Underground Is Massive is the first-ever big-picture history of the American electronic dance music underground, viewed through the lens of nineteen parties over thirty years—from the black, gay underground clubs of Chicago and Detroit's elite teen-party scene through nineties "electronica" to today's EDM-festival juggernaut, the book takes in the rise of the Internet and Burning Man, 9/11, and the collapse of the record business—and vividly charts why and how it took nearly three decades after electronic dance music became a global youth soundtrack for it to hit big in the land that birthed it. Through unparalleled insider access to anecdotes, interviews, and history, Michaelangelo Matos demystifies how what once belonged to a devoted audience of casual partiers and diehard dancers has become America's soundtrack of choice and changed the music industry completely. Matos expertly tackles the vast diversity of EDM's musical landscape, its technologically prophetic yet illicit origins, and the path by which underground raves grew into fiercely successful music festivals. Taking in legendary artists from Frankie Knuckles to Moby as well as the biggest names in EDM—Diplo, Skrillex, Deadmau5, David Guetta, Ti?sto, and Daft Punk—Matos's deep mix of sources and wide-lens overview of the culture make every chapter a page-turning revelation.
Creating a Charmed Life
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How Does She Do ItWe all know-and envy-women who appear to live "charmed" lives. They seem to unhurriedly and effortlessly manage the whirlwind of their busy lives with grace and poise. Good things happen to them, and their lives are filled with serendipity, joy, and prosperity. But it's not a matter of luck, according to Victoria Moran; a charmed life isn't something that happens to you-it's something you create! In Creating a Charmed Life, Victoria Moran unveils practical, spiritual secrets for expanding your capacity to love, know, and experience a fuller, richer life. Her insight, humor, and unassailable wisdom shine through each page to illuminate the magic in all our lives.Relish the calmCreate miraclesNurture your dreamsSavor simplicityInvite adventureNourish your spirit
All Joy and No Fun
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Thousands of books have examined the effects of parents on their children. But almost none have thought to ask: What are the effects of children on their parentsIn All Joy and No Fun, award-winning journalist Jennifer Senior tries to tackle this question, isolating and analyzing the many ways in which children reshape their parents' lives, whether it's their marriages, their jobs, their habits, their hobbies, their friendships, or their internal senses of self. She argues that changes in the last half century have radically altered the roles of today's mothers and fathers, making their mandates at once more complex and far less clear. Recruiting from a wide variety of sources in history, sociology, economics, psychology, philosophy, and anthropology she dissects both the timeless strains of parenting and the ones that are brand new, and then brings her research to life in the homes of ordinary parents around the country. The result is an unforgettable series of family portraits, starting with parents of young children and progressing to parents of teens. Through lively and accessible storytelling, Senior follows these mothers and fathers as they wrestle with some of parenthood's deepest vexations and luxuriate in some of its fi nest rewards.Meticulously researched yet imbued with emotional intelligence, All Joy and No Fun makes us reconsider some of our culture's most basic beliefs about parenthood, all while illuminating the profound ways children deepen and add purpose to our lives. By focusing on parenthood, rather than parenting, the book is original and essential reading for mothers and fathers of today and tomorrow.
My Name Is Love
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Featured in the film Twenty Feet From Stardom, the woman whose voice the New York Times said is as embedded in the history of rock 'n' roll as Eric Clapton's guitar and Bob Dylan's lyrics tells her story Right out of high school, Darlene Love began singing lead vocals for legendary producer Phil Spector, cutting such classic hits as the number one He's a Rebel, Da Doo Ron Ron, and He's Sure the Boy I Love. As part of the girl group the Blossoms, she held a regular spot on television's Shindig!, and with Bob B. Soxx the Blue Jeans she toured the country.Later, she sang backup and collected numerous scintillating backstage stories with, among others, Dionne Warwick, the Mamas and the Papas, and Sonny and Cher. Now in My Name Is Love, Darlene is ready to tell her tales about Elvis coming on to her backstage during his famous '68 Comeback Special, about wild parties she witnessed at Tom Jones's house, and about her love affair with Bill Medley of the Righteous Brothers. She also recalls how she found herself cleaning houses in Beverly Hills, heard herself on the radio, and vowed to make a comeback. That comeback has included roles in all of the Lethal Weapon movies, starring roles on Broadway, and headlining concert appearances worldwide.A dishy, behind-the-scenes showbiz memoir, My Name Is Love is also the inspiring story of a woman who refused to give up.
How to Survive the Titanic
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A brilliantly original and gripping new look at the sinking of the Titanic through the prism of the life and lost honor of J. Bruce Ismay, the ship's owner Books have been written and films have been made, we have raised the Titanic and watched her go down again on numerous occasions, but out of the wreckage Frances Wilson spins a new epic: when the ship hit the iceberg on April 14, 1912, and one thousand men, lighting their last cigarettes, prepared to die, J. Bruce Ismay, the ship's owner and inheritor of the White Star fortune, jumped into a lifeboat filled with women and children and rowed away to safety. Accused of cowardice and of dictating the Titanic's excessive speed, Ismay became, according to one headline, The Most Talked-of Man in the World.The first victim of a press hate campaign, he never recovered from the damage to his reputation, and while the other survivors pieced together their accounts of the night, Ismay never spoke of his beloved ship again. In the Titanic's mail room was a manu* by that great narrator of the sea, Joseph Conrad, the story of a man who impulsively betrays a code of honor and lives on under the strain of intolerable guilt. But it was Conrad's great novel Lord Jim, in which a sailor abandons a sinking ship, leaving behind hundreds of passengers in his charge, that uncannily predicted Ismay's fate. Conrad, the only major novelist to write about the Titanic, knew more than anyone what ships do to men, and it is with the help of his wisdom that Wilson unravels the reasons behind Ismay's jump and the afterlives of his actions.Using never-before-seen letters written by Ismay to the beautiful Marion Thayer, a first-class passenger with whom he had fallen in love during the voyage, Frances Wilson explores Ismay's desperate need to tell his story, to make sense of the horror of it all, and to find a way of living with the consciousness of lost honor. For those who survived the Titanic, the world was never the same. But as Wilson superbly demonstrates, we all have our own Titanics, and we all need to find ways of surviving them.
The Journey Home
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The legendary New York Yankees catcher tells the incredible and unexpected story of his career, his past, and the father-son bond that fueled his love of the gameFor seventeen seasons, the name Jorge Posada was synonymous with New York Yankees baseball. A fixture behind home plate throughout the Yankees' biggest successes, Jorge worked tirelessly to become the Yankees' star catcher, and in the years that followed, his accomplishments, work ethic, and leadership established him as one of the greatest Yankees ever to wear pinstripes.Now, in this long-awaited memoir, Jorge details his road to home plate, sharing a remarkable generational account of his journey from the ball fields of Puerto Rico to the House That Ruth Built. Offering a view from behind the mask unlike any other, Jorge discusses the key moments, great plays, and big-league personalities that marked Yankees baseball for a generation. With pitch-by-pitch recall, he looks back across the years, going inside friendships forged on the field and explaining how as part of the Core Four alongside Derek Jeter, Andy Pettitte, and Mariano Rivera he helped to reestablish the Yankees as a dynasty and win five World Series. Along the way he tells a story of how his team, along with manager Joe Torre, became his home away from home, teaching him that family isn't defined by blood, but by the people who supported him through it all. Going beyond his all-star career, Jorge also shares his life in full for the first time. Examining how his path to the big leagues began in the most unexpected of ways, Jorge digs into his cultural roots in Puerto Rico, the Dominican Republic, and Cuba to illuminate three generations of cherished father-son relationships that have made him the man he is today. At the center is the deep bond he shares with his father and namesake, Jorge Sr., who escaped Cuba and helped to mold his son into a ballplayer, honing his talent and instilling in him the drive necessary to fulfill his childhood dream of playing in the Bronx.More than just a baseball story, The Journey Home is a tale of two families the inspiring yet challenging family Jorge was born into, and the adoptive Yankees family that catapulted him to glory. Complete with sixteen pages of color photographs, this touching and earnest memoir is a testament to hard work, brotherhood, and the generational gift of baseball between fathers and sons.
Machines of Loving Grace
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Robots are poised to transform today's society as completely as the Internet did twenty years ago. Pulitzer prize-winning New York Times science writer John Markoff argues that we must decide to design ourselves into our future, or risk being excluded from it altogether.In the past decade, Google introduced us to driverless cars; Apple debuted Siri, a personal assistant that we keep in our pockets; and an Internet of Things connected the smaller tasks of everyday life to the farthest reaches of the Web. Robots have become an integral part of society on the battlefield and the road; in business, education, and health care. Cheap sensors and powerful computers will ensure that in the coming years, these robots will act on their own. This new era offers the promise of immensely powerful machines, but it also reframes a question first raised more than half a century ago, when the intelligent machine was born. Will we control these systems, or will they control us?In Machines of Loving Grace, John Markoff offers a sweeping history of the complicated and evolving relationship between humans and computers. In recent years, the pace of technological change has accelerated dramatically, posing an ethical quandary. If humans delegate decisions to machines, who will be responsible for the consequencesAs Markoff chronicles the history of automation, from the birth of the artificial intelligence and intelligence augmentation communities in the 1950s and 1960s, to the modern-day brain trusts at Google and Apple in Silicon Valley, and on to the expanding robotics economy around Boston, he traces the different ways developers have addressed this fundamental problem and urges them to carefully consider the consequences of their work. We are on the brink of the next stage of the computer revolution, Markoff argues, and robots will profoundly transform modern life. Yet it remains for us to determine whether this new world will be a utopia. Moreover, it is now incumbent upon the designers of these robots to draw a bright line between what is human and what is machine.After nearly forty years covering the tech industry, Markoff offers an unmatched perspective on the most drastic technology-driven societal shifts since the introduction of the Internet. Machines of Loving Grace draws on an extensive array of research and interviews to present an eye-opening history of one of the most pressing questions of our time, and urges us to remember that we still have the opportunity to design ourselves into the future before it's too late.
Don't Try This at Home
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Step into the booth. Check your judgments at the curtain. Close your eyes. Listen: you can hear the voices of the visitors who sat here before you: some of the most twisted, drug-addled, deviant, lonely, lost, brilliant characters ever to be caught on film. What do you have to offer the booth?
Eating Viet Nam
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A journalist and blogger takes us on a colorful and spicy gastronomic tour through Viet Nam in this entertaining, offbeat travel memoir, with a foreword by Anthony Bourdain. Growing up in a small town in northern England, Graham Holliday wasn’t keen on travel. But in his early twenties, a picture of Hanoi sparked a curiosity that propelled him halfway across the globe. Graham didn’t want to be a tourist in an alien land, though; he was determined to live it. An ordinary guy who liked trying interesting food, he moved to the capital city and embarked on a quest to find real Vietnamese food. In Eating Viet Nam, he chronicles his odyssey in this strange, enticing land infused with sublime smells and tastes. Traveling through the back alleys and across the boulevards of Hanoi—where home cooks set up grills and stripped-down stands serving sumptuous fare on blue plastic furniture—he risked dysentery, giardia, and diarrhea to discover a culinary treasure-load that was truly foreign and unique. Holliday shares every bite of the extraordinary fresh dishes, pungent and bursting with flavor, which he came to love in Hanoi, Saigon, and the countryside. Here, too, are the remarkable people who became a part of his new life, including his wife, Sophie. A feast for the senses, funny, charming, and always delicious, Eating Viet Nam will inspire armchair travelers, curious palates, and everyone itching for a taste of adventure.
Out of Orange
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Cleary Wolters was going about her everyday life when she saw a commercial for a new TV show that stopped her in her tracks. The scene showed a young blond woman hopping out of a van, wearing an orange prison uniform. A blur of words and images followed, including allusions to lesbian lovers, drug smuggling, and life behind bars. Then Cleary saw a woman wearing her signature black-rimmed glasses and she dropped the remote. In that moment, Cleary knew that her private past had been brought to light in the most public way imaginable. Nothing would ever be the same again.Orange Is the New Black went on to become an Emmy-winning cultural phenomenon streamed onto laptops and into living rooms around the world. The series, and the number one New York Times bestselling book of the same name, follows Piper, a privileged white woman who spent thirteen months in prison for her involvement in an international drug-smuggling ring. Cleary binge-watched the show along with the rest of the universe, though what was fun for everyone else was a weirdly personal, strangely unnerving interpretation of events that had shaped her own life.Now speaking out for the first time to share her story including how she introduced Piper to the criminal activities that would ultimately send both of them to prison Cleary tells a brutally honest, emotional tale of the bold decisions and epic mistakes she made and the struggle to keep them from defining the rest of her life.
You're Not the Boss of Me
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"Save me! My child is acting like a brat!"What parent hasn't thought her child was a brat at one point or anotherWhether your child really is a brat, is at risk of becoming one, or is simply trying to grow up in a world filled with temptations and distractions, you'll love this book! It's the ultimate hands-on guide to cultivating character traits that are tried-and-true "bratbusters." Full of no-nonsense, practical "Tips and Scripts," You're Not the Boss of Me offers just the help you need to deal with many of the more challenging behaviors typical of four- to twelve-year-olds. With Betsy Brown Braun's humorous, supportive, and authoritative voice as a guide, navigating some of the most exasperating aspects of these formative years with confidence and laying the groundwork for your child's future just got a whole lot easier! It's All Here What to Say and Do to Help Your Child: Get Over the Gimmes Tell the Truth Be Self-Reliant Develop Empathy Show Gratitude Be Respectful Take Responsibility Be Independent Exercise Humor and Not Be Spoiled!
You Never Give Me Your Money
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The world stopped in 1970 when Paul McCartney announced that he was through with the Beatles. His statement not only marked the end of the band's remarkable career, but also seemed to signal the demise of an era of unprecedented optimism in social history. Though the Beatles' breakup was widely viewed as a cultural tragedy, one of the most fascinating phases of their story was just about to begin.Now, for the first time, You Never Give Me Your Money tells the behind-the-scenes story of the personal rivalries and legal feuds that have dominated the Beatles' lives since 1969. Journalist Peter Doggett charts the Shakespearean battles between Lennon and McCartney, the conflict in George Harrison's life between spirituality and fame, and the struggle with alcoholism that threatened to take Richard Starkey's life. In vivid detail, Doggett also describes the wild mismanagement of the Beatles' fortune staked largely in Apple Corps. You Never Give Me Your Money is a compelling human drama and an equally rich and absorbing story of the Beatles' creative and financial empire, set up to safeguard their interests but destined to control their lives. From tragedy to triumphant reunion, and chart success to courtroom battles, this meticulously researched work tells the previously untold story of a group and a legacy that will never be forgotten.
Ashley's War
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In 2010 the U.S. Army Special Operations Command created Cultural Support Teams, a pilot program to put women on the battle field alongside Army Rangers, Green Berets, Navy SEALs, and other special operations teams on sensitive missions in Afghanistan. The idea was that women could access places and people that had remained out of reach and could build relationships woman to woman in ways that male soldiers in a conservative, traditional country could not. Though officially banned from combat, female soldiers could be "attached" to different teams, and for the first time women throughout the Army, the National Guard, and the Reserves heard the call to join male soldiers on special ops missions. Each had her own reason for wanting to serve alongside America's finest fighters for wanting, as the recruiting poster advertised, "to be part of history."In Ashley's War, Gayle Tzemach Lemmon uses exhaustive firsthand reporting and a finely tuned understanding of the complexities of war to tell the story of CST-2, a unit of women handpicked from across the Army, and of the remarkable hero at its heart: First Lieutenant Ashley White. Lemmon reveals how First Lieutenant White and the pioneers of CST-2 worked to earn the respect of combat-tested special operations warriors and illuminates the very human stakes of their battlefield successes. Transporting readers into the little-known world of the CSTs, a community of fierce women bound together by valor, danger, and the desire to serve, Ashley's War is a gripping combat narrative and a testament to the unbreakable bond of friendship born of war.
Making the Case
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After an eleven-year-old Kimberly Guilfoyle lost her mother to leukemia, her dad wanted her to become as resilient and self-empowered as she could be. He wisely taught her to build a solid case for the things she wanted. Creating a strong logical argument was the best way to ensure she could always meet her needs. That childhood lesson led her to become the fearless advocate and quick-thinking spitfire she is today. In Making the Case, Guilfoyle interweaves stories and anecdotes from her life and career with practical advice that can help you win arguments, get what you want, help others along the way, and come out ahead in any situation.Learning how to state your case effectively is not just important for lawyers it's something every person should know how to do, no matter what stage of life they are in. From landing her dream job right out of school, switching careers seamlessly midstream, and managing personal finances for greater growth and stability to divorcing amicably and teaching her young child to advocate for himself, Guilfoyle has been there and done it. Now she shares those stories, showing you how to organize your thoughts and plans, have meaningful discussions with the people around you, and achieve your goals in all aspects of your life. You'll also learn the tips and strategies that make the best advocates so successful, some of which come directly from courtroom scenarios where the stakes are highest.Told in her winning and humorous voice, Guilfoyle's experiences and the wisdom drawn from them are a ready guide to help you reach your potential and live a fulfilling and happy life at work and at home.
Memories Before and After the Sound of Music
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The heartwarming true story of the family made legendary by The Sound of Music as told by Agathe, the eldest von Trapp daughter. The Sound of Music has captivated generations with its inspiring story of courage, love, music, and familial devotion. Audiences the world over have taken the von Trapp family into their hearts, joyfully celebrating their many triumphs and their daring escape from the Nazis.In this charming, poignant, and unforgettable memoir, Agathe von Trapp, the eldest daughter, shares the true story of her family, the events that inspired the internationally beloved musical and film, and what happened to the von Trapps in the years after. Blessed with impeccable recall, Agathe shares her vivid memories of a childhood spent in an idyllic Austrian home with her brothers, sisters, and gentle, loving father; of the tragic loss of their mother; of the arrival of Maria; and of the bonding of a close-knit group of siblings who achieved great fame and endured great hardship.Beautifully adorned with Agathe von Trapp's sketches and personal photographs, Memories Before and After the Sound of Music transports readers to a bygone time as it tells the intimate, loving story of a renowned and truly remarkable family.
Teaching a Stone to Talk
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Here, in this compelling assembly of writings, Pulitzer Prize-winning author Annie Dillard explores the world of natural facts and human meanings.
Freedom
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There are few men who are as quintessentially American as Sonny Barger. He is patriotic a veteran who loves his country. He is independent choosing his own path on his motorcycle, living life on his own terms. He is outspoken he has boldly criticized injustices in American law and society despite the backlash this has evoked from the establishment. Yet the element that he finds most important, most sacred, most American, is freedom.In Freedom, Sonny articulates many of the principles he employs in his own life. Whether he is regarded as a leader, a rebel, a revolutionary, a criminal, or a soldier, Sonny's outlook has been influenced not just by school but by the military, prison, and his experiences riding with the world's most notorious motorcycle club. It was on these various journeys that he learned the lessons that are most important in his life and the qualities he respects when he sees them in others:IndependenceCustomize Yourself; Originals Don't Come Off an Assembly LineToughnessTemper the Steel to Forge a Strong BladeFairness Treat Me Good, I'll Treat You Better; Treat Me Bad, I'll Treat You Worse Presented in the form of fifty credos, this book gives Sonny Barger's perspective on how to live a life that embodies the most fundamental of American virtues: freedom.
