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万本电子书0元读

Fifteen Candles
Fifteen Candles
Lopez, Adriana V.
¥84.05
For the uninitiated, the quincea era celebrates the passage of a fifteen-year-old girl into adulthood: It's a bit bat mitzvah with a dash of debutante ball, and loaded with the same potential for hilarity and adolescent angst. In this original anthology, fifteen of the brightest and funniest Latino writers, men and women alike, share their own memories of these moving and often absurd extravaganzas tales of that unique form of familial humiliation that is borne of the best intentions, fierce love, and the infectious joy of parents finally allowing their little girl to grow up.
The Worst Noel
The Worst Noel
Collected Authors of the Worst Noel
¥83.93
Does the thought of mistletoe give you hivesDoes the sound of jingling bellsinstill fear in your heartDo you hide under the covers from the day after Thanksgiving till New Year's DayAnd even if you love Christmas, do thehyperconsumerism, overindulgence, andtinsel-covered everything make you crazy?If you said yes to any of these questions, this is the book for you. You are not alone. Everyone has a Christmas-nightmare story to tell. Some of the best writers around have gone through some of the worst Christmases ever. Their tales of holly-draped horror are gathered here for your amusement, from NEAL POLLACK's Christmas-ham disaster to the accidental Santahood of JONI RODGERS to BINNIE KIRSHENBAUM's receiving what may be the worst gift ever given. And Stanley Bing gives us a peek at the lonely guy's Xmas feast. All this, plus many more recollections of Worst Noels past.So pour yourself a glass of eggnog, chisel off a piece of rock-hard fruitcake, and curl up in the big comfy chair by the fireplace where the stockings have been hung with such care -- and settle in to read The Worst Noel.
101 Reasons to Dump Your Man and Get a Cat
101 Reasons to Dump Your Man and Get a Cat
Katz, Molly
¥83.93
The modern woman has enough hassles without having to put up with the antics of the man in her life. Why endure another day of snoring, football, and wet towels on the floorWith this hilarious, fully illustrated guide, learn 101 reasons why you should dump your chump and hook up with a cat! So, besides the fact that your man's just not that into you, can he scratch his ear with his footIs he adorable when he pounces off the fridge onto your shoulderDo you get to watch him nudge another man aside and eat his foodAnd can you improve his mood by tossing a fuzzy mousie for him to chaseOf course not. There; that's four reasons to dump him and get a cat instead! Plus, you never have to remember how your cat takes his coffee. You don't need to pretend to your cat that you haven't had many other cats. And if your cat thinks your friends are hot, so whatFor every woman who's had enough of men, 101 Reasons to Dump Your Man and Get a Cat is the perfect gift—chock-full of humor, inspiration, and great advice. Why look for love in all the wrong places when it's right across the room chasing its own tail?
Daddy, Stop Talking!
Daddy, Stop Talking!
Carolla, Adam
¥94.10
Last Will & Testament of Adam CarollaI, Adam Carolla, being of beaten-down mind, declare this to be my Last Will and Testament. I revoke all wills and addendums previously made by me. (You guys never did listen, anyway.) Article II appoint the rest of the world's unappreciated dads as Personal Representatives to administer this Will. I bequeath to them the right to crack a couple cold ones in the garage after working their asses off all week and ask that they be permitted to watch all the porn they like and not have to change diapers and get dragged to every preschool "graduation" and PTA meeting. Article IITo my wife, I leave a safe-deposit box, the sole content of which is a note reading "Get a job. I'm dead," and my best wishes on trying to keep up with the unending demands of our houses, cars, dog, and kids.Article IIII devise, bequeath, and give my kids this book, Daddy, Stop Talking. Since you guys were the death of me, I leave you these pages of wisdom. But no cash, cars, or property. You've got to earn those. On that note, I further demand that the following message be placed on the marker of my grave: "You're All on Your Own Now. Enjoy."
Drinking Problems at the Fountain of Youth
Drinking Problems at the Fountain of Youth
Teitell, Beth
¥140.08
Short of spending every waking hour engaged in antiaging treatments, is there anything the average woman can do to shave even a few months from her appearanceDo any of the miracle creams, procedures, or magic potions actually make a person look more youthfulDoes a woman have to worry about her nasolabial folds if she doesn't even know where they're located on her bodyVeteran journalist Beth Teitell aims to find the answers to these questions and many more in her hilarious travels looking for the elusive elixir of youth. If you feel bad about your neck (or any other body part), if the idea of Botox-filled syringes fills you with horror, if you don't want to empty your wallet to pay for $475 serums that promise to cheer up aging skin or the hourly cost of a facial-fitness coach, or if you don't believe the claims of antiaging gummy bears or age-defying bottled water, then Drinking Problems at the Fountain of Youth is the book for you. There's not a woman in America who won't see herself in Teitell's struggles or come away feeling that the enormous amount of energy, time, and money we spend trying to restore our bodies to the way they were when we were twenty could be better spent elsewhere. With honesty, outrage, and wit, Teitell goes deep into the youth-at-any-cost culture and takes it apart from the inside out. And then she reassures us that there is hope there are things we can do to look and feel younger, and ways we can learn to stop worrying about looking older.Drinking Problems at the Fountain of Youth is for every woman who isn't as young as she used to be a book of wisdom and advice, and a laugh-out-loud look at our age-obsessed culture.
My Drunk Kitchen
My Drunk Kitchen
Hart, Hannah
¥129.07
One day, sad cubicle dweller and otherwise bored New York transplant Hannah Hart decided, as a joke, to make a fake cooking show for her friend back in California. She turned on the camera, pulled out some bread and cheese, and then, as one does, started drinking. (Doesn't everyone cook with a spoon in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other?) The video went viral and an online sensation was born. My Drunk Kitchen includes recipes, stories, full color photos, and drawings to inspire your own culinary adventures in tipsy cooking. It is also a showcase for Hannah Hart's great comedic voice. Hannah offers key drink recommendations, cooking tips (like, remember to turn the oven off when you go to bed) and shares never-before-seen recipes such as: ?The Hartwich (Knowledge is ingenuity! Learn from the past!) ?Can Bake (Inventing things is hard! You don't have to start from scratch!) ?Latke Shotkas (Plan ahead to avoid a night of dread!) ?Tiny Sandwiches (Size doesn't matter! Aim to satisfy.) ?Saltine Nachos (It's not about resources! It's about being resourceful.) This is a book for anyone who believes they have what it takes to make a soufflé for the holiday party and show up the person who apparently has nothing better to do than bake things from scratch. It also recommends the drink you'll need to accompany any endeavor of this magnitude. In the end, My Drunk Kitchen may not be your go-to guide for your next dinner party . . . but it will make you laugh and drink . . . I mean think . . . about life.
It's Not Easy Bein' Me
It's Not Easy Bein' Me
Dangerfield, Rodney
¥77.49
An American comic icon tells the story of his second act rise from obscurity to multimedia stardom. "When I was a kid," writes Rodney Dangerfield, "I worked tough places in show business places like Fonzo's Knuckle Room. Or Aldo's, formerly Vito's, formerly Nunzio's. That was a tough joint. I looked at the menu. They had broken leg of lamb." For once, one of America's most beloved comic icons isn't kidding. Dangerfield has seen every aspect of the entertainment industry: the rough and tumble nightclubs, the backstage gag writing sessions, the drugs, the hookers, the lousy day jobs and the red carpet star treatment. As he traces his route from a poor childhood on Long Island to his enshrinement as a comedy legend, he takes readers on a roller coaster ride through a life that has been alternately touching, sordid, funny, raunchy, and uplifting equal parts "Little Orphan Annie" and "Caligula." And unlike most celebrity autobiographers, he seems to have no qualms about delivering the unfiltered whole story, warts and all. Dangerfield's personal story is also a rollicking show business tale, full of marquee name droppings (Adam Sandler, Sam Kinison, Jim Carrey, Johnny Carson, Jerry Seinfeld) and good stories about same. Defying the old saws about the fleeting nature of fame and the dearth of second acts in American life, Dangerfield transformed himself from a debt ridden aluminium siding salesman named Jack Roy to a multimedia superstar and stayed an icon for decades. His catchphrase "I get no respect" has entered the lexicon, and he remains a visible cultural presence and perennial talk show guest. Dangerfield's hilarious and inspiring musings should thrill comedy fans and pop culture watchers, and his second act comeback will strike a chord with readers of all stripes. Maybe he'll even get some respect.
The Freedom Manifesto
The Freedom Manifesto
Hodgkinson, Tom
¥90.77
The author of How to Be Idle, Tom Hodgkinson, now shares his delightfully irreverent musings on what true independence means and what it takes to be free. The Freedom Manifesto draws on French existentialists, British punks, beat poets, hippies and yippies, medieval thinkers, and anarchists to provide a new, simple, joyful blueprint for modern living. From growing your own vegetables to canceling your credit cards to reading Jean-Paul Sartre, here are excellent suggestions for nourishing mind, body, and spirit witty, provocative, sometimes outrageous, yet eminently sage advice for breaking with convention and living an uncluttered, unfettered, and therefore happier, life.
Red, White & Liberal
Red, White & Liberal
Colmes, Alan
¥83.93
As one of the foremost liberal voices in television and radio today, Alan Colmes has long been braving the wilds of controversial issues and conservative slander. The host of the talk-radio show Fox News Live with Alan Colmes and cohost of Fox News Channel's hit debate show Hannity Colmes, Colmes now offers this witty, passionate wake-up call to America.Colmes takes on the fundamental question: How can we protect our nation without diminishing our liberties, and regain our place in the world as an example of democracyColmes urges Americans to see past the government's manipulation of the War on Terror to silence critics; the lies we've been force-fed about the war in Iraq and Afghanistan; and the conservative smear campaign that has turned "liberal" into a four-letter word. From debunking the myth of the liberal media to exposing conservative hypocrisy, Colmes presents the issues with thoughtful, provocative arguments, hard facts and logic, and searing humor.Certain to spark debate and cause readers to reevaluate and reaffirm their beliefs, Red, White Liberal powerfully argues that despite our differences, we must extend our hands across party lines to find solutions, protect our shores, and preserve our freedoms.
How Paul Robeson Saved My Life and Other Stories
How Paul Robeson Saved My Life and Other Stories
Reiner, Carl
¥56.15
Carl Reiner has been making people laugh since the days of The Dick Van Dyke Show. His showbiz bits with Mel Brooks about the 2000 Year Old Man have become the stuff of comedy legend. Jerry Seinfeld, Alan Alda, Neil Simon, Steve Allen, and Richard Lewis were all bowled over by the comic genius of The 2000 Year Old Man in the Year 2000: The Book. Now, in his wonderful new book, Carl Reiner shows off the talent and humor that have made him a comedic superstar.Filled with rich, multidimensional tales, this collection of short stories from one of America's truly great comedic minds is at once poignant, nostalgic, and laugh-out-loud funny. "How Paul Robeson Saved My Life." the story of Reiner's experiences in the army during World War II, is a darkly funny look at racism. "Lance and Gwendolyn" is a modern-day fairy tale with some surprising twists. "Dial 411 for Legal Smut" is a tongue-in-cheek look at phone sex. Whatever topic he tackles, Reiner always manages to capture the highs and lows, the follies and foibles of everyday life.
Imponderables
Imponderables
Feldman, David
¥72.01
Why does an "X" stand for a kiss?Which fruits are in Juicy Fruit gumWhy do people cry at happy endings?Why do you never see baby pigeons?Pop-culture guru David Feldman demystifies these topics and so much more in Why Don't Cats Like to Swim-- the unchallenged source of answers to civilization's most perplexing questions. Part of the Imponderables series, Feldman's book arms readers with information about everyday life -- from science, history, and politics to sports, television, and radio -- that encyclopedias, dictionaries, and almanacs just don't have. Where else will you learn what makes women open their mouths when applying mascara?
The Best Thing About My Ass Is That It's Behind Me
The Best Thing About My Ass Is That It's Behind Me
Walter, Lisa Ann
¥145.49
Follow one woman's bumpy, cellulite-riddled ride through size-0 Hollywood and learn how she went from body-dysmorphic to sassy-asstastic in only twenty-five short years of dieting, thousands of dollars in "procedures,". . . and one pair of industrial-strength Spanx.From the best girlfriend you didn't know you had comes this "I Can't Believe She Said That" guide to life in the real world. Actress and comic Lisa Ann Walter dishes about parenthood and the dangers of girl-on-girl snarking, explains why skinny actresses act crazy, and gives riotous advice on everything from the dating mistakes we all make to ten things you should subtract when you weigh yourself (self-tanner and dental work, for starters . . .).So what do you get when you drop a longtime self-loather into the glitz and glamour of HollywoodThis hysterical, and brutally honest, look at the impossible standard of perfection for which so many of us strive. Walter boldly shares her lifelong struggle with low self-esteem which, in her case, includes plenty of painful auditions, failed relationships, and awkward celebrity encounters, plus lots of impossible diets, questionable injectables, and dubious cosmetic procedures. Along the way, the "celebrity adjacent" Walter also tells her sometimes warm, often cringeworthy, and always funny Hollywood stories (including the reason she'd kill for Richard Gere). She also shares her sage advice by offering features such as ways to improve your self-esteem that won't cost you a dime:Four words:Push-up. Bra. Construction. Site. You don't even have to look good to get a response. Just wear sunglasses, square your shoulders, and toss your hair. Then count the whistles.Start frequenting your local gay bar. Both gays and lesbians are much more effusive about how fabulous you are! And you'll get free drinks! Always be seen with decrepit old men you'll look young and beautiful in comparison. Think how well this works for those Girls Next Door.
Art of the Film: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
Art of the Film: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
Dermot Power
¥279.90
Step inside the world of the talented art departments who, led by Academy Award?-winning production designer Stuart Craig, were responsible for the creation of the unforgettable characters, locations and beasts from the eagerly anticipated new adventure in J.K. Rowling’s Wizarding World.The Art of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, edited by Dermot Power, concept artist on the film, takes you on a magical journey through a design process every bit as wonderful as that encountered by Newt Scamander in the wizarding world: from the earliest gatherings of the artists, designers and filmmakers to the magical time of the film’s production itself at Leavesden Studios.Bursting with hundreds of production paintings, concept sketches, storyboards, blueprints and matte paintings, and filled with unique insights about the filmmaking journey from Stuart Craig and the artists themselves, this superb book – officially licensed by Warner Bros. Consumer Products – presents a visual feast for readers, and will welcome fans of Harry Potter films into the world of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.
Wear This Now
Wear This Now
Michelle Madhok
¥73.58
Stop Wondering What to Wear and Wear. This… Now. That first date, job interview or dinner with your future in-laws may be stressful, but figuring out what to wear for it shouldn’t be. And thanks to style expert Michelle Madhok and the editors of SHEfinds.com, it isn’t. Members of the team behind SHEfinds.com make a living putting the perfect outfit together (at the right price), and they’ve taken the guesswork out of getting dressed. From basic essentials to special events, learn how to build a foolproof wardrobe―without breaking the bank―and look stylish for every season, every occasion, every single day of the year. Get the inside scoop on: Designer deals and steals, When to invest and when to spend less, The essentials for every season, S.O.S. for any (and every) style conundrum, Navigating the sales racks―and seasons!―like a pro
The Garden in the Clouds: From Derelict Smallholding to Mountain Paradise
The Garden in the Clouds: From Derelict Smallholding to Mountain Paradise
Antony Woodward
¥66.22
A warm, witty memoir of one man’s escape from the city in an unlikely quest to create out of a mountainous Welsh landscape a garden fit for inclusion in the prestigious Yellow Book – the ‘Gardens of England and Wales Open for Charity’ guide – in just one year. It was a derelict smallholding so high up in the Black Mountains of Wales it was routinely lost in cloud. But to Antony Woodward, Tair-Ffynnon was the most beautiful place in the world. Equally ill-at-ease in town and country after too long in London’s ad-land, Woodward bought Tair-Ffynnon because he yearned to reconnect with the countryside he never felt part of as a child. But what excuse could he invent to move there permanently? The solution, he decided, was a garden. In just a year he’d create a garden so special it would be selected for the prestigious Yellow Book – the famous National Gardens Scheme guide to gardens open to the public for charity. It’s an unlikely ambition to entertain in this most unlikely of settings, and one that soon sees Woodward driven by odder and odder compulsions – from hauling a 20-tonne railway carriage up the mountain to making hay with hopelessly antiquated machinery. The path to Woodward’s elusive sense of belonging turns out to be a rocky and winding one, taking in childhood haunts, children’s books and Proustian nostalgia trips. As the family battles gales, mud and Welsh mountain sheep of marble-eyed cunning, not to mention the notoriously fastidious NGS County Organiser, it remains deeply uncertain whether the ‘Not Garden’ and the ‘infinity vegetable patch’ (that grows only stones) will ever make the grade… Warm, thought-provoking and brilliantly funny, this is a memoir of a hopeless romantic with a grandly ludicrous ambition – an ambition to which anyone who’s ever dropped into a garden centre, or opened a packet of seeds, has already succumbed.
The Allotment Book
The Allotment Book
Andi Clevely
¥110.46
A wonderfully illustrated celebration of the blood, sweat and joy to be had ‘growing your own’ in an allotment – with the in-depth, practical gardening know-how for which Collins is renowned. No longer considered the preserve of old men in sheds, allotment gardening is currently enjoying a renaissance of interest. People of all ages and from all walks of life are digging their own plots in search of the ultimate in fresh, organic produce – and you cannot get more locally-sourced than your own allotment! This book testifies to the vibrancy of allotment culture, aiming both to inspire the next generation of plot-holders and to provide all the practical knowledge needed to turn a patch of soil into a lifelong adventure. Open to all the eco-gardening techniques, and the various weird and wonderful ways people make use of their plots, contents include: ? the history of allotments – from 19th century origins, through wartime ‘Dig for Victory’, to the cosmopolitan communities of today; features photos and interviews with current plot-holders ? planning your perfect allotment – finding it, assessing it, clearing the ground and working out what to grow ? the brown stuff – all you need to know about soil management, the key to growing success ? choosing a gardening method – organic, biodynamic, rotation beds, companion planting, greenhouse, multi-level, potager, cottage garden, and so on… ? the hard stuff – constructing sheds, compost bins, cold frames, fruit cages, ponds, seating and play areas ? selecting crops – what and how to grow, from parsnips and peas to chilli peppers and lemon grass ? cultivation techniques – digging, sowing, feeding, weeding and harvesting, plus troubleshooting pests and diseases ? the allotment calendar – extensive, month-by-month look at what’s in season, jobs for now and looking ahead
Oils (Collins You Can Paint)
Oils (Collins You Can Paint)
Linda Birch
¥44.24
Linda Birch paints in oils, watercolour and pastels and has taught amateurs for many years. She writes regularly for the Leisure Painter magazine and is author of The Indoor Artist. She has also illustrated many children’s books.
Scottish Dance: A celebration of Scottish dancing (Collins Little Books)
Scottish Dance: A celebration of Scottish dancing (Collins Little Books)
The Royal Scottish Country Dance Society
¥44.24
The Royal Scottish Country Dance Society (Charity No. SC 016085; Company No. SC480530), is dedicated to promoting Scottish Country Dance. The Society exists to promote and develop Scottish country dancing worldwide for the benefit of present and future generations. It has a world-wide network of Branches and Affiliated Groups, with a small administrative team at its central office in Edinburgh.
Life Moves Pretty Fast
Life Moves Pretty Fast
Hadley Freeman
¥66.22
Hadley Freeman brings us her personalised guide to American movies from the 1980s – why they are brilliant, what they meant to her, and how they influenced movie-making forever. For Hadley Freeman, American moves of the 1980s have simply got it all. Comedy in Three Men and a Baby, Hannah and Her Sisters, Ghostbusters, Back to the Future and Trading Places; all a teenager needs to know – in Pretty in Pink, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Say Anything, The Breakfast Club and Mystic Pizza; the ultimate in action – Top Gun, Die Hard, Young Sherlock Holmes, Beverly Hills Cop and Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom; love and sex – in 9 ? Weeks, Splash, About Last Night, The Big Chill, Bull Durham; and family fun – in The Little Mermaid, ET, Big, Parenthood and Lean On Me. Born in the late 1970s, Hadley grew up on a well-rounded diet of these movies, her entire view of the world, adult relations and expectations of what her life might hold was forged by these cult classics. In this personalised guide, she puts her obsessive movie geekery to good use, detailing the decades key players, genres and tropes, and how exactly the friendship between Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi influenced the evolution of comedy. She looks back to a cinematic world in which bankers are invariably evil, despite this being the decade of Wall Street, where children are always wiser than adults, and science is embraced with an intense enthusiasm, and the future viewed with excitement. She considers how the changes between movies then and movies today say so much about pop culture’s and society’s changing expectations of women, young people and art, and explains why Pretty in Pink and Sixteen Candles should be put on school syllabuses immediately.
Painting Expressive Watercolours
Painting Expressive Watercolours
Mike Chaplin,Diana Vowles
¥82.31
Mike Chaplin is one of the most popular art experts on the very successful Channel 4 series Watercolour Challenge. In this book he reveals how he works and puts forward his ideas and teaching methods, offering plenty of tips and practical advice for the amateur artist. This book is intended for artists with some painting experience who wish to develop their technique, style and outlook. It is a book to make them think and to push the technical and personal boundaries of what they believe they can achieve in paint. Mike’s teaching focuses not only on techniques but also on expanding the readers’ approach to their painting as a whole. Starting with a fascinating look at the development of watercolour as an expressive art, the book then covers selective techniques, both traditional and the more unusual, and topics such as observation, drawing, colour and composition. All kinds of painting subjects are included, from the natural landscape to urban scenes, and throughout the book Mike provides plenty of practical advice and useful tips about techniques. There are also a number of special features, focusing on particular aspects of painting, as well as several full step-by-step demonstration paintings.
May Martin’s Sewing Bible e-short 6
May Martin’s Sewing Bible e-short 6
May Martin
¥15.60
The last of 6 eBook-only shorts from star of The Great British Sewing Bee and doyenne of the Women’s Institute, May Martin, including fabulous tips for making those difficult sewing techniques easy to master. May has been teaching sewing for over 40 years. From hems to facings May simplifies some of the trickiest methods in sewing for those already experienced and needing a little extra helping hand in the art of sewing. Beautifully styled and simple-to-follow, this authoritative sewing e-short, taken from May Martin’s Sewing Bible, offers three new approaches to some of the more complicated ways of sewing.
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