万本电子书0元读

万本电子书0元读

The Best Thing About My Ass Is That It's Behind Me
The Best Thing About My Ass Is That It's Behind Me
Walter, Lisa Ann
¥145.49
Follow one woman's bumpy, cellulite-riddled ride through size-0 Hollywood and learn how she went from body-dysmorphic to sassy-asstastic in only twenty-five short years of dieting, thousands of dollars in "procedures,". . . and one pair of industrial-strength Spanx.From the best girlfriend you didn't know you had comes this "I Can't Believe She Said That" guide to life in the real world. Actress and comic Lisa Ann Walter dishes about parenthood and the dangers of girl-on-girl snarking, explains why skinny actresses act crazy, and gives riotous advice on everything from the dating mistakes we all make to ten things you should subtract when you weigh yourself (self-tanner and dental work, for starters . . .).So what do you get when you drop a longtime self-loather into the glitz and glamour of HollywoodThis hysterical, and brutally honest, look at the impossible standard of perfection for which so many of us strive. Walter boldly shares her lifelong struggle with low self-esteem which, in her case, includes plenty of painful auditions, failed relationships, and awkward celebrity encounters, plus lots of impossible diets, questionable injectables, and dubious cosmetic procedures. Along the way, the "celebrity adjacent" Walter also tells her sometimes warm, often cringeworthy, and always funny Hollywood stories (including the reason she'd kill for Richard Gere). She also shares her sage advice by offering features such as ways to improve your self-esteem that won't cost you a dime:Four words:Push-up. Bra. Construction. Site. You don't even have to look good to get a response. Just wear sunglasses, square your shoulders, and toss your hair. Then count the whistles.Start frequenting your local gay bar. Both gays and lesbians are much more effusive about how fabulous you are! And you'll get free drinks! Always be seen with decrepit old men you'll look young and beautiful in comparison. Think how well this works for those Girls Next Door.
The Worst Noel
The Worst Noel
Collected Authors of the Worst Noel
¥83.93
Does the thought of mistletoe give you hivesDoes the sound of jingling bellsinstill fear in your heartDo you hide under the covers from the day after Thanksgiving till New Year's DayAnd even if you love Christmas, do thehyperconsumerism, overindulgence, andtinsel-covered everything make you crazy?If you said yes to any of these questions, this is the book for you. You are not alone. Everyone has a Christmas-nightmare story to tell. Some of the best writers around have gone through some of the worst Christmases ever. Their tales of holly-draped horror are gathered here for your amusement, from NEAL POLLACK's Christmas-ham disaster to the accidental Santahood of JONI RODGERS to BINNIE KIRSHENBAUM's receiving what may be the worst gift ever given. And Stanley Bing gives us a peek at the lonely guy's Xmas feast. All this, plus many more recollections of Worst Noels past.So pour yourself a glass of eggnog, chisel off a piece of rock-hard fruitcake, and curl up in the big comfy chair by the fireplace where the stockings have been hung with such care -- and settle in to read The Worst Noel.
101 Reasons to Dump Your Man and Get a Cat
101 Reasons to Dump Your Man and Get a Cat
Katz, Molly
¥83.93
The modern woman has enough hassles without having to put up with the antics of the man in her life. Why endure another day of snoring, football, and wet towels on the floorWith this hilarious, fully illustrated guide, learn 101 reasons why you should dump your chump and hook up with a cat! So, besides the fact that your man's just not that into you, can he scratch his ear with his footIs he adorable when he pounces off the fridge onto your shoulderDo you get to watch him nudge another man aside and eat his foodAnd can you improve his mood by tossing a fuzzy mousie for him to chaseOf course not. There; that's four reasons to dump him and get a cat instead! Plus, you never have to remember how your cat takes his coffee. You don't need to pretend to your cat that you haven't had many other cats. And if your cat thinks your friends are hot, so whatFor every woman who's had enough of men, 101 Reasons to Dump Your Man and Get a Cat is the perfect gift—chock-full of humor, inspiration, and great advice. Why look for love in all the wrong places when it's right across the room chasing its own tail?
Daddy, Stop Talking!
Daddy, Stop Talking!
Carolla, Adam
¥94.10
Last Will & Testament of Adam CarollaI, Adam Carolla, being of beaten-down mind, declare this to be my Last Will and Testament. I revoke all wills and addendums previously made by me. (You guys never did listen, anyway.) Article II appoint the rest of the world's unappreciated dads as Personal Representatives to administer this Will. I bequeath to them the right to crack a couple cold ones in the garage after working their asses off all week and ask that they be permitted to watch all the porn they like and not have to change diapers and get dragged to every preschool "graduation" and PTA meeting. Article IITo my wife, I leave a safe-deposit box, the sole content of which is a note reading "Get a job. I'm dead," and my best wishes on trying to keep up with the unending demands of our houses, cars, dog, and kids.Article IIII devise, bequeath, and give my kids this book, Daddy, Stop Talking. Since you guys were the death of me, I leave you these pages of wisdom. But no cash, cars, or property. You've got to earn those. On that note, I further demand that the following message be placed on the marker of my grave: "You're All on Your Own Now. Enjoy."
Drinking Problems at the Fountain of Youth
Drinking Problems at the Fountain of Youth
Teitell, Beth
¥140.08
Short of spending every waking hour engaged in antiaging treatments, is there anything the average woman can do to shave even a few months from her appearanceDo any of the miracle creams, procedures, or magic potions actually make a person look more youthfulDoes a woman have to worry about her nasolabial folds if she doesn't even know where they're located on her bodyVeteran journalist Beth Teitell aims to find the answers to these questions and many more in her hilarious travels looking for the elusive elixir of youth. If you feel bad about your neck (or any other body part), if the idea of Botox-filled syringes fills you with horror, if you don't want to empty your wallet to pay for $475 serums that promise to cheer up aging skin or the hourly cost of a facial-fitness coach, or if you don't believe the claims of antiaging gummy bears or age-defying bottled water, then Drinking Problems at the Fountain of Youth is the book for you. There's not a woman in America who won't see herself in Teitell's struggles or come away feeling that the enormous amount of energy, time, and money we spend trying to restore our bodies to the way they were when we were twenty could be better spent elsewhere. With honesty, outrage, and wit, Teitell goes deep into the youth-at-any-cost culture and takes it apart from the inside out. And then she reassures us that there is hope there are things we can do to look and feel younger, and ways we can learn to stop worrying about looking older.Drinking Problems at the Fountain of Youth is for every woman who isn't as young as she used to be a book of wisdom and advice, and a laugh-out-loud look at our age-obsessed culture.
My Drunk Kitchen
My Drunk Kitchen
Hart, Hannah
¥129.07
One day, sad cubicle dweller and otherwise bored New York transplant Hannah Hart decided, as a joke, to make a fake cooking show for her friend back in California. She turned on the camera, pulled out some bread and cheese, and then, as one does, started drinking. (Doesn't everyone cook with a spoon in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other?) The video went viral and an online sensation was born. My Drunk Kitchen includes recipes, stories, full color photos, and drawings to inspire your own culinary adventures in tipsy cooking. It is also a showcase for Hannah Hart's great comedic voice. Hannah offers key drink recommendations, cooking tips (like, remember to turn the oven off when you go to bed) and shares never-before-seen recipes such as: ?The Hartwich (Knowledge is ingenuity! Learn from the past!) ?Can Bake (Inventing things is hard! You don't have to start from scratch!) ?Latke Shotkas (Plan ahead to avoid a night of dread!) ?Tiny Sandwiches (Size doesn't matter! Aim to satisfy.) ?Saltine Nachos (It's not about resources! It's about being resourceful.) This is a book for anyone who believes they have what it takes to make a soufflé for the holiday party and show up the person who apparently has nothing better to do than bake things from scratch. It also recommends the drink you'll need to accompany any endeavor of this magnitude. In the end, My Drunk Kitchen may not be your go-to guide for your next dinner party . . . but it will make you laugh and drink . . . I mean think . . . about life.
The English:A Field Guide
The English:A Field Guide
Matt Rudd
¥73.58
A hilarious field guide to the world’s most remarkable and unusual creatures: the English. Thanks to television documentaries by Bruce Parry and David Attenborough, we are better acquainted with the hunting rituals of the San bushmen and the mating habits of Papua New Guinean tribes than we are with the everyday lives of that most peculiar of species – the English. In ‘The English: A Field Guide’, Sunday Times journalist Matt Rudd, sets out to uncover what makes us, the English, tick. He will examine us in our natural habitats, starting with the living room and moving out to the kitchen, the garden, the commuter train, the office, the motorway, the high street, the sports stadium, the pub, club, bingo hall, balti house, beach and ending up in the bedroom. Hilarious, warm-hearted and surprisingly enlightening, ‘The English’ shines a strong searchlight on us all.
Pearl Lowe’s Vintage Craft:50 Craft Projects and Home Styling Advice
Pearl Lowe’s Vintage Craft:50 Craft Projects and Home Styling Advice
Pearl Lowe
¥114.48
Vintage designer Pearl Lowe shows you how to create the authentic vintage look in your own home with her expert advice and simple craft projects. This practical guide, complete with inspiring photography includes … ? 50 step-by-step craft projects ? Sewing, painting, upcycling and crafting secrets ? A how-to guide to sourcing your own vintage treasures ? And Pearl’s little black book of shops and suppliers An absolute must-have for lovers of vintage and all things handmade. Craft projects include … Dyed lace window panels Vintage bunting Midsummer and winter wreaths Gypsy-style apron Two-toned fringed lampshade Personalised rubber stamp Sumptuous padded headboard Upcycled chest of draws Antique ghost mirror Handmade vintage-style tiles The patterns and templates in this ebook are best viewed on an ereader that supports colour and has a zoom function.
The Alchemist
The Alchemist
Ben Jonson
¥8.09
The Alchemist
Caged: A Poetry Collection
Caged: A Poetry Collection
Eunice Ojigwe
¥32.62
Caged: A Poetry Collection
Poetic Memoirs Of A Young Son: A Collection of Poems
Poetic Memoirs Of A Young Son: A Collection of Poems
Eugy Enoch
¥32.62
Poetic Memoirs Of A Young Son: A Collection of Poems
Orders and Medals of USSR
Orders and Medals of USSR
Andrei Besedin
¥81.67
Orders and Medals of USSR
My Thoughtful Words
My Thoughtful Words
Lorraine Donfor-Chen
¥43.74
My Thoughtful Words
Dreaming in Darkness
Dreaming in Darkness
Jessica Kristie
¥24.44
Dreaming in Darkness
Breakers
Breakers
Ronald Micci
¥32.29
Breakers
Sight-Reading Samurai: for all musicians: Treble Clef
Sight-Reading Samurai: for all musicians: Treble Clef
Marcus Monteiro
¥48.97
Sight-Reading Samurai: for all musicians: Treble Clef
Biff Bang, American Hero: and Other Plays
Biff Bang, American Hero: and Other Plays
Ronald Micci
¥65.99
Biff Bang, American Hero: and Other Plays
Wings of Words
Wings of Words
James LAM
¥32.62
Wings of Words
My Poetry Is A Song
My Poetry Is A Song
K.C. Anyanele
¥32.62
My Poetry Is A Song
Myriads: A Collection of Poems
Myriads: A Collection of Poems
Irusota The Poet
¥32.62
Myriads: A Collection of Poems
The Ladies Faire
The Ladies Faire
A.D. Hurley
¥23.30
The Ladies Faire